Death and Taxes
(Part 2 of Conspiracy of Blood)
This episode was written by Robert L. McCullough and Phillip John Taylor, and directed by Ray Austin.
(Outside Los Angeles. Mendoza and De Soto are on horseback searching for Zorro’s lair.)
De
Soto: Aha! Another cave, Sergeant.
Mendoza: But, Alcalde, we’ve already searched twelve caves today. Still no sign
of Zorro.
De Soto: Well, Sergeant, in less than 48 hours, we’re both going to hang unless we find Zorro, so I suggest it’s worth the effort.
Mendoza: (Drawing his sword and approaching the cave entrance) Why me, Alcalde!
De Soto: Do it!
Mendoza: (Crossing himself.) Are you in there, Zorro? (A bear growls from inside the cave and Mendoza comes running back out, yelling.) There’s definitely no Zorro in the cave.
De Soto: Well, we move on. (He turns his horse around as Mendoza scrambles to mount again.) Come along, Sergeant.
(Outside the church in the pueblo. The congregation is exiting the church.)
Diego: I’ve never seen such a small turnout for Sunday mass before.
Alejandro: People are afraid to come to town, Diego.
Diego: (He clasps the Padre Benitez’ hands in his as he passes him on the steps.) Padre. (Behind them, Resindo comes out of the doors behind De Soto)
Resindo: I assume you said your prayers, Alcalde, because if you don’t capture Zorro within two days, you’ll soon be meeting your maker. (De Soto and Mendoza leave and Resindo approaches the padre.) A splendid mission you have here, Padre Benitez.
Benitez: Well, thank you. It was built by the local Indians.
Resindo: Under Spanish rule and supervision, of course. Well, then I’m sure you appreciate His Majesty’s generosity.
Benitez: Generosity? But it is the duty of every Christian king to send the word of God to the four corners of the earth.
Resindo: Hm. Just as it is your duty to discharge this mission’s obligations to the royal throne.
Benitez: With all respect, our only obligation is to God.
Resindo: God is not engaged in war with the French. We are. (A little way away, the conversation reaches the ears of the de la Vegas) And since the Church shares our duty to support the Spanish crown in that effort, I hereby confiscate all mission properties.
Alejandro: What?! You can’t do that.
Resindo: Really? And just who is going to stop me?
Benitez: But this is unheard of. What you propose, it’s unprecedented.
Resindo: It is rather creative, I agree.
Alejandro: Be warned, Señor Resindo, the people of this pueblo will never stand for this.
Resindo: The people are a seditious pack of jackals. Don’t threaten me with insurrection, de la Vega. For years, the Church has grown fat with the help of the crown. Now it is simply time to pay the piper. (Resindo and Hidalgo begin walking away.)
Hidalgo: De la Vega’s right. This could force the people to rise up against us. (Resindo smiles as he walks away amid the glowering faces.)
(The plaza. The people are protesting the takeover of the Church with signs and chants as the de la Vegas ride into town. Armed soldiers watch the crowd.)
(The alcalde’s office. Hidalgo enters and goes to watch out the window with Risendo.)
Hidalgo: Allow me to arrest the ringleaders and make an example of them.
Resindo: No, Lieutenant, let them simmer a while longer. An angry mob is easily led by the nose and I know precisely where to lead them.
(The plaza.)
Alejandro: Time for a town meeting. Come on! (He motions the crowd into the tavern.)
(The tavern. Alejandro addresses the crowd. Diego looks on with concern.)
Alejandro: My friends, we are faced with the brazen disregard for the sanctity of our church. (The crowd roars)
Benitez: No! No, no, no, my friends. Rebellion is not the answer.
Victoria: His troops will crush us. We have to get Zorro to help us.
Resindo: (Entering.) Good people, the fact is I share your concerns. But you’ve got to take a broader view of things. I’ve been sent here to collect a special war tax. If I return to Madrid empty handed, the King will undoubtedly make an example of this pueblo, a violent, bloody example. You see, my friends, there are two very inescapable realities of life, death and taxes. And you must choose between them.
Benitez: The Church has never been required to pay taxes.
Resindo: If the people of Los Angeles would only pay the balance of this special assessment, I would not be forced to confiscate Church property.
Benitez: Many people have paid.
Resindo: True, Padre. Humble farmers go hungry to support their country’s war effort. But as long as certain wealthy caballeros avoid paying taxes, I have no choice but to sell off Church property to make up the deficit.
Man: What do you mean? Why don’t they pay the same tax as us?
Resindo: Because they get tax credits for supplying the military garrison with beef.
Alejandro: Yes, but the value is well below the market price.
Resindo: And the get twelve thousand acres of prime land tax free just for putting it under the plow.
Alejandro: That is perfectly legal.
Resindo: It may well be perfectly legal, my friends, but, as always, there is one law for the rich and another for the rest of us.
Man: Who does this? Which caballeros? (Diego rolls his eyes. He’s seen this coming.)
Resindo: Well, there are two right here. (He looks from Diego to Alejandro.)
Man: Let there be decided to take their hacienda instead of our church. (Resindo nods as the crowd grows noisy.)
(The hacienda. Diego is trying to read as Alejandro writes a letter.)
Diego: What good will a letter to the Governor do? Resindo is an Emissary to the King. (There is a knock on the door.)
Alejandro: Are you expecting someone?
Diego: No.
Alejandro: (Getting up) Well, I’m still sending the letter. (He crosses to Felipe and has him open the door.) Emissary Resindo, Lieutenant Hidalgo, what can I do for you?
Resindo: Aren’t you going to invite us in?
Alejandro: Of course. Why not. Diego!
Resindo: (Entering and looking around) Magnificent hacienda! How long have you lived here?
Alejandro: Many years. Ever since my father first arrived and worked the land.
Resindo: Indeed. But I’m afraid your fellow Los Angelinos won’t let you justify
your failure to pay taxes on the backs of your ancestors. You see, the mere
threat of my seizing Church property very nearly caused a riot earlier today and
since part of my responsibility is to prevent civil insurrection, the will of
the people must be taken into account. (Diego and Felipe exchange looks)
Lieutenant Hidalgo, if you please. (Hidalgo
opens the door, and a number of armed soldiers enter.) Alejandro de la Vega, by the power invested in me by King Ferdinand, I
hereby seize this hacienda and all adjacent property.
(The hacienda. As the grounds are patrolled by armed guards, Resindo writes a letter to his mother.)
Resindo: (Voiceover) And so, dearest mother, I cannot wait for you to join me where we truly belong, in the magnificent de la Vega hacienda. Now only one more hurdle remains. (Felipe polishes the boots of Hidalgo as he writes.) Alejandro and Diego will soon be groveling at my feet.
Hidalgo: Don Alejandro is not going to take this eviction lying down.
Resindo: It’s Diego that troubles me. (He gets up and walks over to the fireplace.)
Hidalgo: I can’t imagine why.
Resindo: Something about him. (Felipe watches as Resindo’s hand inches toward the lever that opens the secret panel.) There’s more to Diego de la Vega than meets the eye. (Felipe looks back at Hidalgo’s boots when Resindo sees him staring.)
(The tavern)
Diego: (As Victoria places a bowl of soup in front of him.) It’s really very kind of you to put us up like this, Victoria.
Victoria: Oh, well, it’s the least I can do for you after all the times that you and Don Alejandro have helped me.
Alejandro: (Entering) Diego! I don’t believe it.
Diego: What’s wrong?
Alejandro: Emissary Resindo. He’s impounded our bank accounts.
Victoria: But he can’t do that.
Diego: As the Emissary is so fond of telling us, he can do anything he pleases.
Alejandro: How do we get our hacienda back?
Man: (At a nearby table) You should have paid your taxes. And then you wouldn’t be in so much trouble.
Alejandro: Señor Peralta—
Diego: Father, please.
Alejandro: The man is living in our hacienda.
Diego: I know. I know. Consider this. If it was simply a matter of collecting the ten thousand peso war tax, he’d quickly sell our hacienda to the first bidder and be on his way back to Madrid. Instead, he chooses to protract this entire affair by taking our hacienda as his own home. And why impound our bank accounts so we have no way of regaining the hacienda. He’s after more than money.
Victoria: Why doesn’t Zorro do something about this man?
Diego: We can’t expect Zorro to fight all our battles. I’m going to Santa Barbara to consult with Don Luiz Cristoba.
Alejandro: Oh, my friend the lawyer.
Diego: Yes. If we are to rid ourselves of Resindo, this battle must be fought in a court of law. I’ll return within three days. Adios. (De Soto and Mendoza enter as Diego leaves.) Alcalde, Sergeant , any luck?
De Soto: No, no luck at all. Resindo’s not in his office. (He looks about fearfully.) He’s not here, is he?
Alejandro: No, Alcalde. The man is firmly ensconced in my hacienda.
Mendoza: You sold your hacienda?
Alejandro: No, Sergeant. We’ve been evicted.
De Soto: Evicted?
Victoria: Diego’s on his way to Santa Barbara to hire a lawyer.
Mendoza: (Sniffing the air and smiling ) Chicken mole.
De Soto: Sergeant, your stomach can wait until after we’ve captured Zorro. (He heads for the door.) Now, Sergeant! (Mendoza follows.)
(The hacienda at night. The guards patrol outside as Felipe pours wine for Resindo and Hidalgo.)
Resindo: Go, boy. Leave the bottle. (Felipe pretends not to hear.) Get out of here. (Hidalgo jumps up and puts a knife to Felipe’s throat and Felipe retreats. The two men laugh and go back to their drinking. Felipe heads for the fireplace.)
(The cave. Felipe fingers Zorro’s cape and Diego slips up behind him. )
Diego: It’s good to see you too, Felipe. You all right? Obviously, I had to come in through the cave. Resindo has the house surrounded with guards. (Felipe draws a “Z” in the air.) Yes, Felipe, tonight is a night Gilberto Resindo will never forget. (They both reach for Zorro’s costume.)
(Outside the hacienda. De Soto and Mendoza are sneaking around the walls of the courtyard within feet of the guards.)
Mendoza: Alcalde, how can you be so sure Zorro will come?
De Soto: The de la Vega’s have been turned out of their own home, Sergeant.
Mendoza: So?
De Soto: There’s no greater friend to Zorro than Don Alejandro de la Vega. Zorro
has to come to help him.
Mendoza: It doesn’t seem right to capture Zorro if he’s coming to help a friend.
De Soto: We’re not trying to capture Zorro, Sergeant. We’re going to kill him.
Mendoza: We are?
De Soto: Do you want to die the day after tomorrow?
Mendoza: No, but I —
De Soto: Then Zorro must die.
(Inside the hacienda. The men have finished their meal.)
Resindo: An excellent meal. I may just take the de la Vega cook back with me to Madrid. (Felipe emerges from the cave.) Where is that boy? (Zorro watches through the peephole as Resindo grabs Felipe.) I want a drink. I don’t care if you are deaf, you insolent pup. This is a brandy glass. When I hold this up and it’s empty, it means I want Brandy. (Zorro is now in the room, watching the exchange.)
Zorro: And you shall definitely have your brandy. (Zorro throws a glass of brandy in his face.)
Hidalgo: (Getting up and drawing his sword.) Let me have him!
Resindo: Kill him and be quick about it.
Zorro: (As Hidalgo comes toward him brandishing his sword broadly) Not again! (Hidalgo thrusts and Zorro kicks him down. He makes two more thrusts and Zorro socks him in the face.) You are quick. (Hidalgo comes forward again and Zorro hits him over the head with a bottle.) But not quick enough.
Resindo: Guards! Zorro!
Zorro:
And here I thought this was just going to be between the two of us. (Guards
enter and fire at Zorro. He ducks and they miss. Zorro grabs one soldier and
turns him around to use the soldiers own arm and sword against the other guard.
Felipe knocks the remaining soldier out by hitting him on the head with a book.
Resindo fires at Zorro and misses, then draws his sword.)
Resindo: You have interfered with my plans for the last time.
Zorro: It is indeed the last time. (Zorro draws his sword and they fence, making a mess of the room.)
(Outside the hacienda, De Soto and Mendoza are still in the shadows.)
De Soto: (hearing the clanging of steel) Zorro’s in there. How did he get in?
Mendoza: He’s a very tricky fellow. Maybe he used the back door.
De Soto: Well, tricky or not, I’ll be the final victor. (He raises his pistol and they both head for the door.)
(Inside the hacienda)
(The fight continues. Zorro finally pulls down a curtain over Resindo and knocks him out. Hidalgo gets up and grabs Zorro, sending Zorro’s sword flying.)
De Soto: (Leveling a pistol at Zorro from the doorway.) Farewell, my masked friend. (De Soto fires as Zorro dodges and the bullet kills Hidalgo.)
Mendoza: What happened, Alcalde? (Zorro leaves as De Soto realizes he’s killed the Emissary’s friend.)
(Outside the tavern. Victoria and Alejandro go into the street as they see De Soto and Resindo bringing a dead body into the pueblo.)
Man: Emissary, what happened?
Resindo: A hero has died fighting for the King of Spain. Alcalde, see that Lieutenant Hidalgo’s body is properly taken care of. I have some unfinished business. Lancer!
Alejandro: So you’re back.
Resindo: Zorro killed my lieutenant.
Victoria: He did?
Resindo: But only after making your house unlivable.
Alejandro: Does that mean you’re abandoning our hacienda.
Resindo: I’ve lost my taste for it. Therefore the Church property will have to be sold to pay for the overdue taxes.
Alejandro: Just one moment. You’ve got the money from my bank accounts. You pay the taxes with that.
Resindo: But since we’ll be investigating the source of your frozen assets, which could take years, those funds aren’t legally available to pay the taxes.
Zorro: (From atop the bank) They are now, Emissary.
Resindo: Zorro! Guards! (Zorro uses his whip to place a board against the quartel gates, locking the troops inside.)
Zorro: I’ve personally released the de la Vega funds from the bank. Since they are now mine, allow me to pay the pueblo’s back taxes. (He throws the bag of money to the ground. The crowd cheers.)
Resindo: You can’t pay the taxes with stolen money.
Benitez: Why not?
Victoria: But that money is really yours, Don Alejandro.
Alejandro: It’s money well spent to save the Church. (Zorro smiles, whistles for Toronado and leaps down onto the saddle. He rides up to Resindo.)
Zorro: You underestimate these good people, amigo.
Resindo: I’ll have your head.
Zorro: Careful, amigo, if you want my head, you’ll get the rest of me. (To the crowd) Remember who your friends are, for only by standing together will any of us be able to stand at all. (The crowd cheers as Zorro rides away.)
(The alcalde’s office at night. Resindo is writing a letter.)
Resindo: (Voiceover) Dear Mother, unforeseen events have undermined my true purpose in volunteering for this assignment—the ruin and humiliation of Alejandro de la Vega and his son. But first there is one obstacle I must overcome, a bandit by the name of Zorro. I shall tear him limb from limb and bring his head back to Madrid on a spike of Toledo steel. There is no alternative. And I will not rest until this is done.
The End